Football Legend Misses Out on Landmark Cap

From our football correspondent Spray Farton:

Newly installed England manager Fabio Capello refused to be swayed by sentiment when he excluded Englands favourite footballer from the squad to face Switzerland next week.

The new Boss

Despite calls for his inclusion the enigmatic Italian chose to ignore veteran striker Dean Windass's claim for inclusion to win his first cap.

"I am frankly not convinced by his match fitness," said Capello at a hastily arranged press conference.

"After all it is some years since he played in a competitive fixture at the top level. When was it he was playing for Oxford United?"

Windass: fag

"I'm gutted" confessed Deano, 38. "What do I have to do to impress this bloke? I've been training all week with the first team squad. I'm as fit as I've ever been," he added as he stubbed out another cigarette.

Windass must now face the prospect of a future free of international committments.

In another shock development a new post appeared on the now derelict "Spraying the Rays" blog for the first time in weeks. It had been thought that the site had succumbed to cyber-vandalism and general lack of interest on the part of readers.

Website in ruins*

"I just happened to be surfing past the site the other day and I thought I noticed some activity," commented former STR reader Istvanski. "and stripe me pink, there it was, another post. It's been very sad watching the old blog fall into disrepair. But I don't suppose it'll ever see the Glory days of 2006 again. There used to be as many as six of us used to read it regular in those days."




Tomorrow: those deadline day transfers in full.

*RIP Boothferry Park